IN HER WORDS

Be Your Own Happiness

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How to be happy in life - Business Today
There are people who wouldn’t know what to do with alone time since all they know is depending on other people to cheer them up. [ Photo / ifnotnow ]
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Happiness is a concept that is very common but also very elusive. They say, ‘Be responsible for your own happiness’. The question is, what are you doing to ensure that you are on top of your game when it comes to your own happiness?

But does everyone really understand what this means? Do people understand the meaning of being responsible for your own happiness? It may sound easy but it is very ambiguous on its own.

How hard can it be?

If anyone were to collect feedback anonymously from people, the largest number of the population would ascribe to not knowing what it actually means to be responsible for your own happiness.

How can I be responsible for my own happiness? Most people don’t understand this since they are used to having other people make them happy. Most answers would involve ‘My kids are my happiness’, ‘My husband/wife is my happiness’, ‘My job/career is my happiness’, My relationship is my happiness’.

Never would you get anyone saying that they are responsible for their own happiness. In fact, most people would think of you as mad if you alluded to being the source of your own happiness.How is that even possible? People are there to make each other happy but individually, it is unheard of lest you be labeled as weird.

 Just for the few

As I said, this is a concept that is very difficult to fully comprehend. Only those deep soul-searching individuals would fully comprehend what it means to be the source of your own happiness. It becomes very difficult to relegate that duty to anyone.

You become very mistrusting to people who you think may be a threat to the concept that you have created and protected around yourself. In fact, these are the people who will never understand how to depend on another person to make them happy.

How can you make yourself happy? This is the most common question asked by people.

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Well, it starts with knowing yourself and understanding what you want in life. This is a concept that is very common among introverts. The kind of people who will retreat into themselves to seek inner peace and clarity.

Do you know that there are people who speak to themselves? Not the crazy or mad people walking by the road in tattered dirty clothes. No. Not those ones, but the classy sophisticated ones who you will see talk to themselves and only get ahold of themselves when they see people approaching.

There are people who don’t understand the purpose of personal time and space.

Have you ever seen someone make a full conversation with him/herself? I mean, a proper conversation with even hand gestures and subtle head nods, only to approach them and find that they were talking to themselves.

It happens and it is healthy only in small doses lest you find yourself in Mathari Hospital. Those are the people who  will withdraw into their safe cocoons when surrounded by jolly people.

My business is our business

The extroverts majorly depend on other people to make them laugh. You will commonly hear them say, ‘Let me call my friend to cheer me up.’ This is a very common phrase among most people. That is why it is only a small percentage of people who truly understand what it means to make themselves happy.

There are people who don’t understand the purpose of personal time and space. All they want is to be surrounded by happy people all over the place to keep them entertained and happy. There are people who wouldn’t know what to do with alone time since all they know is depending on other people to make them laugh or to keep them cheered up. You need to learn how to be happy in life.

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Why delegate the power of your joy to someone else? What happens when they are no longer there to cheer you up? Does that mean that you postpone your happiness? Isn’t that giving people too much power over your life?

Do not get me out of context. It is good to share and talk about problems and seek a second opinion on the same but does that mean that your entire life is dependent on people’s opinions of you?

There are people who never do anything on their own without another person’s input in their decision making. Sharing is good since it helps in fighting depression and other mental problems. But at times, it is paramount to sit down quietly and reflect on your life on your own without having to involve every Tom, Dick, and Harry in your personal business.

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Written by
DORRIS KYALO -

Dorris Kyalo, a Bachelor of Commerce (Finance Major) student, is currently pursuing CPA. Email: [email protected]  

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